P.S.

I am SO glad i do not have to write benisawesome every time I sign on!!!!

I hand in my pen (figuratively)

Adieu

Farewell Creative Writing Class 101. My time spent here will never be forgotten. (I mean I did learn how to spell here). Ms. Rut, you will be missed. But remember, anytime you watch Homestarrunner, we will be there. Whenever you watch the Carve-nival episode of Homestarrunner, we will especially be there. Whenever you read a boring nature adventure story, think of us, and we will get you through it. When times get you down, think of all the times you made fun of me for being sad.

I will leave you with a poem entitled Good Bye Ms. Rut:

Good bye Ms. Rut,

you are not a poser.

You were/are a very good teacher,

I will miss you next year.

(I was never good at writing poems.)

ILOVEYOUMS.RUT!!!!!

Love,

Liz (I'm not posting my last name due to internet stalkers)

A.K.A. TheLiz (Not The Cheat)

And so it ends . . .

. . . and I can't even believe it. It's over---all of it---the laborious slow start---all that whining about spelling and writers' block---the crushing ennui---and then a spark---Pumpkin Carve-nival---the rest is history.

It all seemed to blossom into life after that---the Spektors' adventures in Baker's closet, Corny the Clown, Reginald, Gregoringourothtroglgor [I was never quite sure what his name was]---Ben's self-revelatory musings---the Point Park Guy---

What can be said about the characters you created? That Jeanette Sinclair and Victor [did he have a last name?], often referred to as Victory, for reasons unknown---might just be the single greatest characters in the history of literature?

And thank God Mac, with the help of Humphrey, in spite of his carnivorous conflicts, saved the Gulf of Mexico by plugging the oil leak!!! I wish, oh I wish, it was true.

I love you both and I will miss you forever---the Carve-nival will never the same. Please, please, please never stop writing. The world will be lonely without you---but on the up side---you'll still be here!!!!!!!

Thank you for coming in early and staying late---and always being absolutely, devastatingly funny. You make me happy just knowing that every day you'll both be somewhere making somebody laugh out loud.

Love and best wishes for your brilliant futures!!!

KR

PS: Please do something to restore the self-esteem of the Jeniuses before you leave. Maybe have them go into Baker's closet and come back out again.

Fare Ye Well Creative Writing.

Farewell year long creative writing class that was supposed to be only a semester, but lasted all year and I'm sure glad it did. I will miss you dearly. You have taught me so much about life, friendship, and that nature adventure stories are just not interesting. I hope you can go on without us creative writing, but I feel that it will just disappear without the awesomeness of the Spektors constantly raising the standards. I will miss you Ms Rut. Your witty, sarcastic comments always made me laugh, as did your making fun of TheLiz's spelling abilities. She learned by the end of the year how spell check worked. The characters we created almost came to life. It was literally as if Victor and Jeanette had the personalities of two of the most awesome creative writers ever (wink, wink). The greatest lesson I learned from my journey through creative writing is that you can write creatively about anything, but whether or not it's actually interesting is another matter. After years of the public school system destroying my creativity, it was stimulated once again thanks to Ms Rut and the awesomeness of the blog. Good bye creative writing. I wish we had more time together.

This is Night Spektor Ben aka Epic man signing off.

Corny the Clown

Gregingor was in his glory. Not only had he found Corny (and in return arrested him on account of his rap sheet was a mile long. Not only had he ran from the police... countless times... but he was also one of the biggest drug traffickers in the US. He used his line of red noses as a cover for his unmatched drug sales.) but he had also caught Reginald, a slave master and as it turned out a murderer. Gregingor didn't think Reginald killed his out of date circus workers himself, but he did order it to happen.

Gregingor was happiest most of all because he had proved his fellow cops wrong. They said he couldn't catch Corny and he did. He couldn't wait to get down to the station and rub it in EVERYONE'S face.

As he slapped the handcuffs on Corny and his sniffing friend slapped them on Reginald he started to brag. Brag about how he the magnificent Gregingor had caught the mischievous and unreachable Corny.

Just when he was about to put Corny in the cop car and lock him away for good something terrible happened. Something absolutely dreadful. The worst thing ever in fact.

Corny escaped.

(Bet you didn't see that coming!)

Hungry

My stomach is growling like the angry dog down the street. You know the one that comes running at you when you walk past the house, but then it gets strangled by it's leash. You laugh at that dog because you think he can never get you, but one of these days that chain is going to break, and then who's going to be laughing? The dog that's who. But yeah anyway I'm hungry... and I just wrote this post so I could post on the second to last day of creative writing.

Stuffy Nose

my nose is plugged as my nose runs

it's an amazing feat of God.

Graduation Party!!!

MISS RUT!!!!

come to my grad party?

(: <---- (reminiscent of the point park guy)

It's from 1:00 to 5:00 (or so) at Peanut Park

On the sixth day of June!!!

Corny the Clown

Gregingor's cop friend lifted his nose and began sniffing for the elusive clues.

"I smell something sweet. So sweet. Like Caroline almost." Gregingor thought that was kind of sketchy. Everyone was sharing a little of Sweet Caroline today. Hm...

"Hey guys you really shouldn't go down this hallway. I mean, there are plenty of other nice hallways to go down and this one's a bit drafty. Come on guys. Awe I mean it. Let's go." Reginald's persistent pleas had no effect on Gregingor. In fact, they were only making his intuition to go down this hallway stronger. Especially since his cop pal had caught a whiff of something.

All of a sudden they saw Corny! WOAH! (This woah is supposed to sound like James's woah.)

"Mr. Reginald, you are in big trouble."

Mac's Journey

After months of traveling, and almost being eaten by Humphrey like eight times, that darn whale just had an appetite for penguins, they were within miles of the Gulf of Mexico. By this point Mac was getting annoyed by Humphrey's constant babbling about how nice the Gulf of Mexico was this time of year. He said that the water was super clean, and that all of the animals there were happy all of the time. Except for that one really bad storm a few years ago that flooded New Orleans a little bit, nothing really went wrong there. So Mac decided that once they got to the Gulf he would chill out there. He would make a home on one of the coastal beaches and live the good life.

Within about 50 miles of shore Mac started to notice this thick stuff on top of the water. "Hey Humphrey. I thought you said this place was nice. It's pretty gross man. And there are also a lot of dead fish hanging out here. I feel that may be an ominous sign."

"Relax Mac. I'm sure this is just a tiny bit of pollution. I'm sure it has already been taken care of, and isn't destroying the beaches or anything."

They continued on their journey to shore, and Humphrey kept getting coated in the thick black stuff that seemed to be causing lots of damage. Suddenly this large metal object appeared on the horizon. They looked below them, and there was this stream of black ooze coming out of the ocean floor. Mac became enraged.

"These people are so freaking stupid. They always come up with these brilliant ideas of opening holes in the ocean, and never plan on things going wrong. Well I'm going to clean up this problem for them." And at that Mac dove deep into the ocean. The black ooze had coated him, but as he reached the bottom he could see where the ooze was coming from. He looked around, grabbed a clam like thing, and shoved it in the hole. The ooze had stopped coming out, and the wildlife was saved. Back on shore those stupid CEOs of the company claimed the oil just stopped coming out itself. They didn't want to reveal that a penguin had solved a problem that a group of highly trained overpaid scientists couldn't.

The Ending of The Game

Victor finally arose from his deep slumber. Or better stated, his deep punch in the face.

He heard crying. Wailing in fact. He looked out of the cabin and down the bank and saw Jeanette harassing some kids.

"She can't have all the fun." thought Victor.

He trekked down the hill to join in. On his way down he found a goat and decided to ride it down on account of he didn't feel like walking.

Then he saw an axe stuck in a tree. "WOAH!" he thought, "an axe! This'll really scare 'em!"

He started picking up speed and began waving his axe in the air.

"I am McGearny the mountain goat man! AYYYEEEE!"

This kids looked up at him in scared surprise and Jeanette gave him one of her worst glares.

"Get away from my land or I'll set this witch on you!" Jeanette had worse glares. This was one of them.

The kids started crying and ran away from the area leaving all of their boring nature-adventure supplies behind.

"Really Victor? That was really the first thing you thought of doing when you saw these kids? Go away for the love of everything. Just go away!"

The tears stung in Victor's eyes as he watched Jeanette walk up to his dream home.

Slowly and into the sunlight Victor road away, with only an axe and a goat to his name, as tears streamed down his eyes.

THE END

The Game

Jeanette decided to sit by the waters edge and watch those kids make fools out of themselves again. She really loved that salmon. He had saved her life and now he was entertaining her with these kids. Sure Victor was locked up in her cabin, but she was just going to wait around until he looked for her elsewhere.

All of a sudden the salmon broke the canoe! He must be a Muskellunge Salmon!!! She broke into hysterics. What were those kids going to do now? HAHAHAHA!

Jeanette watched as the kids were trying to fix each other up. Clearly they had never taken first aid with Mrs. Fink (because that was a thing SENIORS did) because they were not properly bandaging each other at all.

Noises started coming from her cabin. That darn Victor who sometimes referred to himself as Victory was going to attract those kids attention. She went up to the little shack and started yelling. "Victor knock it off! I mean it! Stop!"

"NO NO NO NONONONO NO NO!"

"Victor you are acting like a child."

"I am rubber you are glue whatev-"

"VICTOR you baby baby infant child. STOP IT!" She went in to the cabin and punched him in the face knocking him out. Well at least that problem is solved for a while she thought to herself.

The Game

Victor paused before the door to a shack in the woods. Jeanette Sinclair was inside sleeping. This was his opportunity to get her out of his life once and for all. He broke open the door with all his might, and Jeanette popped awake with her gun drawn. Victor was prepared for this. Suddenly he dropped to his knees sobbing. "Jeanette can you please just go away. I want you out of my life so I can finally live in peace." He was crying like a big baby at this point. "Seriously, can you just fake your own death or something so the people at the FBI get off my back and so I can retire. We've been at this for like fifteen years or more. I really just want this whole thing to be over." Victor looked around at the nice shack Jeanette had found. "Hey wait. Maybe I could fake my own death, and then live here in this rustic house. It would be like I was living in some crappy nature adventure story." Jeanette at this point was amazed by Victor's lack of dignity and also his short attention span. He had literally jumped from begging her to leave him alone to being fascinated by the house. It was just too much for her. As he was walking around the little shack she snuck out the door slammed it shut and locked him in there. It would be an hour or so before Victor realized that Jeanette was gone, so she figured she was going to lose him for sure this time.

The Game

Jeanette was so bored with her nature adventure life she thought she was going to scream.

The Game

Victor woke up still in the hospital, and for some strange reason his right cheek hurt. He looked in a mirror and saw a hand print on his face where Jeanette had slapped him with all the force she had. (Which incidentally wasn't that much force so Victor's cheek only stung a little, he's just a big baby that can't deal with any pain.) This made Victor extremely angry. "Who slaps someone who just had a heart attack?" He thought to himself. With all of the strength he had left he jumped out of his hospital bed, got dressed and stormed out of his room. As he was leaving the hospital he decided to get a nurses number. He said it was just in case he had any set backs, but really he wanted it was so he could call her after he finally took care of Jeanette. (He did not have a chance with this nurse.) Off Victor went to search the country side for Jeanette Sinclair. This time he was resolving this whole ordeal and getting her out of his life, whether that meant capturing her or not he didn't care. Victor just wanted some peace and quiet. You know boredom for once in his life. He wanted to sit back and read those nature adventure stories that put people to sleep just because they relaxed him. In fact his ideal home was a shack in the woods near a river with a pet goat. He only wished he could find such a place, but that was a matter for a different day. Today Victor was getting Jeanette Sinclair out of his life once and for all.

The Game

Jeanette made her way to an isolated river. Her Gucci stilettos kept sticking into the mud. She was beginning to think Lake Tahoe would have been the much better choice regardless of the crazy rumors that were going around. Mr. Tickle-Whisker Herman Schneider did not particularly enjoy being swished in the face with flying branches that reminded him of something his father had once said. "Ralph (that was his real name, not what stupid Jeanette had done to him) never go in to the forest alone, stars shine in many directions and many moons make crescents, but never stop chasing mice." Mr. Tickle-Whisker still for the life of him had no clue what that meant, but since they were doing that nature adventure thing he figured it fit.

Jeanette got ecstatic as she happened upon an old abandoned shelter. Over the doorway it read "McGarney lives here: buzz off", but she didn't think much of it. Mr. Whiskers on the other hand knew what was up and decided he was going to leave in the middle of the night before any chainsaws or donkeys came after them.

After they entered the shelter Jeanette tried to make it swank. But she couldn't. 'Maybe I'm not as good as I think I am,' she thought to herself, 'nah, this place is icky and hopeless. It has nothing to do with me.' Then she heard children erupting with laughter. 'Whaaaa?' She thought to herself.

She looked out the window and saw two boys and two girls, a cheaply made canoe, and the salmon that had saved her life. Jeanette tried to wave to him but he looked like he was busy. She went back inside, laid on the couch and decided to take a nice nature adventure nap.

The Game

Jeanette's intention was not to give Victor an almost fatal heart attack. Her intention had been to just give him a little scare. Just a small one. But no, he had to be Mr. Drama Drama Baby Man. As she left the emergency room she slapped him across the face. She really had no reason for doing this, but he looked so peaceful just laying there and she hated him so much.

She left the room plotting. He was too weak to capture her or anything like that but maybe in 3-5 years he would be feeling better. What to do? She decided she was going to move somewhere. But where? Paris? Rome? Lake Tahoe?

Jeanette ran back to her super swank and fly apartment, grabbed her cat and her possessions and made her way out of that miserable place.

The Game

As Victor was brushing his teeth, and basking in his victory, a sudden smell arrived in his nostrils. It was a smelly smell. A smell that smelled, smelly. It was the smell of a woman that was supposed to be drowned like a mob snitch in the bottom of the Chicago River. He turned, and there was nothing. Victor's eyes started to dart from wall to wall, and he slowly walked out of his bathroom. He grabbed his arsenal of weapons off of the wall, (This made him look kind of like Rambo.) and prepared himself for the worst. As he turned the corner into his study, he stepped on a pair of cheaply made leather shoes. The kind that Jeanette Sinclair had been wearing the night he dumped her in the river. Victor was beginning to become uneasy. "Why must she torture me like this!" He screamed. And at that moment Victor collapsed. His heart had given out. The next thing he knew, he was in a hospital bed with tubes coming out of his body, and right before he passed out again, he saw the flash of Jeanette Sinclair's coat leaving his hospital room.

The Game

Jeanette was swimming with the fishes. Literally. Unfortunately, she did not know how to swim. She started kicking and flailing her arms but she was sinking into perpetual darkness. Her body started to go numb and she stopped her nonsense kicking. She was doomed. Victor was finally going to have a victory, his first ever. How unfortunate. Jeanette started to feel something biting her toes. It was very unpleasant. She tried to shake it off when all of a sudden it grabbed her toe and swam her to the surface.

Holy Moses!!! Did a dolphin come and save her? She wiped the water from her eyes and looked at her savior. It was a salmon. A salmon that seemed like it should be in some semi-snoozer nature adventure story.

"Thank you fish, thank you so much!"

"You're welcome Jeanette, now go finish what Victor started! AYYEEEEEE!!!"

With that the fish took off and Jeanette stood on the water's edge. Her heart grew a few sizes that night.

Then with an unmatched vengeance Jeanette took off to go take care of that Victor guy once and for all.

The Game

(When we last saw Victor his dignity had been stolen, and he was trapped. Again. For the third time. Today we find him crying in a corner because his man hood has been stolen from him.)

"Why am I such a bad detective?" Victor sobbed. "I've spent fifteen years as an FBI agent and I've only caught one of the people on our most wanted list. That guy Truman has caught like 13 of them. They should have fired me years ago."

Jeanette was listening to Victor cry like a big baby the entire time. She had a soft spot for the guy, and couldn't help but feel bad. She decided she would go talk to him.

"Victor. Are you okay?" She asked. Right then he turned and punched her right in the face. Knocking her out cold.

"Steal my dignity will you? Well now it's your turn." Victor decided to put her in a canvas bag, and drop her to the bottom of the Chicago River. "You'll be swimming with the fishes now." He began to laugh his maniacal laugh as he walked back to his car. He drove straight to the airport, and got on a flight to Georgia. He could now enjoy the rest of his life because the lousy Jeanette Sinclair would no longer be causing him the grief she had caused him for the last ten years.

Elizabeth Kersey

E-very day I come to school, I like to

L-earn.

I- didn't skip school on friday because I am just so

Z-ealous about said school.

A-fter school though I can't wait for it to

B-e summer! Oh summer

E-venings.

T-anning,

H-eat flashes.

K-rill going into whales mouths.

E-els not going into anything's mouth.

R-unning is something I will say I will do, but I won't.

S-wimming is something I will learn to do!

E-aster is over!

Y-AY SUMMER!!

The Urge

to hit the next blog button.

i can't stop this addiction.

The Breakdown

i need my mom ):

I spent most of yesterday cleaning my apartment and packing some of the things I've collected over the last four years. "I hope they all had a good time at prom last night," I said to my roommate from beneath a pile of fuzzy slippers and sweaters that should have been taken home weeks ago. I then started to think about how exciting (and scary!) your next few months will be. On your own for the first time, forced to make decisions you've never had to make before. You'll be meeting people that will make huge impacts on your lives, in both positive and negative ways, and people you will think were insignificant but were actually quite the contrary. You will get to decide if/when you go to class, what you'll have for dinner each night, and just how many times you can wear, then Febreeze, those jeans before washing them is aaaabsolutely necessary. I wouldn't know anything about that last one...

I wondered what I would want to know, if I had to do this all over again. I thought maybe this list of helpful hints might be beneficial to you as well :)

1. Join every club you can...you'll be tired, but you will be thankful you did it later!

2. Go to class! The alarm goes off...you snuggle up with your stuffed otter, telling yourself that it's not a huge deal if you miss just one more class. It's tempting to sleep in, especially in the winter, but when the semester is ending you won't be the guy pleading for mercy from the professor.

3. Ben, Dr. Roberts (an English professor) cancels class often ;) keep this in mind when scheduling time sneaks up on you

4. Enjoy the convenience of the fast food, but only now and then. Freshman 15 is NOT a joke!

5. Take advantage of the library, computer labs, rec centers, etc. Might as well use what you're paying for!

6. Ben, living in Reinhard is convenient but, they charge you TOO much money and when you're looking at student loans you'll wish you hadn't chosen the Hilton of Clarion. There are plenty of other great places to live, that won't make you get rid of your hamsters! Okay, that's just me being bitter, but still!

7. Liz, sorry I keep aiming some of these at Ben...but I know zilch about Point Park :)

8. Hey Liz...I'd be afraid of moving to Pittsburgh too!

9. Hey Liz....you looked stunning at prom! (is this making up for my lack of previous posts?)

10. Even if you choose to stay in the same dorm/apartment for your entire experience....clean out after each school year! I'm going to need 3 U-hauls to get home!

11. In the beginning, you'll want to come home every weekend. In the end, you won't want to leave.

12. Ration your money...I've been doing this for four years and I'm STILL completely broke by the end of each year. Easier said than done, I know.

13. Don't panic!

14. Sorry for not posting before :(

Well, that's all I have for now...but I'm sure my next 3 days of packing will bring more wisdom than you ever wanted to hear :)